I need a new barber

You see, when we moved here I hunted around for a new place to get a haircut. For a while we went to a Regis Stylist in the big mall but there were two problems there. First they were a bit on the spendy side. I mean $35 for a cut seems like a bit much when I only have half of a head of hair. Secondly it was clear from the posters and the music, and the little 20 something stylist that I was really outside of their target demographic.

So I hunted around and then found a little barber shop at the top of the hill. On the corner of the mall, there are actually two stylists. Another Regis Salon and a little independent place. When I walked by I noticed a couple of things. First the Regis had nobody in it and one stylist reading at the front desk. The place next to it had four chairs working and six people in line waiting. This was a good sign. Second the words "Barber Shop" were in the name. It even had a real motorized and lighted barber pole out front.

Well, I knew which place I was going.

It turned out that it was run by an old guy that had been a barber for like forty years. He did a good haircut that cost $15. He also only hired experienced barbers work in his shop. These were all good things. So I started going there. This went on far a good long while.  Then one day I went in and the old guy was gone. He'd retired and turned the shop over to the barbers he'd hired. I kept going there and all was well for a while.

Then about this time last year I went in and noticed that only one of the old guys was still there. Younger stylists just out of school were running most of the chairs now. The haircut was not as good as usual but I figured it was a one time thing. Then last October when I went in (Yes I get my hair cut twice a year. I don't have that much so I can go a long time between cuts. It's one of the advantages of getting old.) none of the old guys were left. This should have been a warning sign. Also I was able to walk right in and get my cut. There was nobody waiting in line. This too should have been a warning sign. But I figured I was there so what the heck.

Not a bright move.

Now usually when I get a haircut Marsha immediately notices and says something complimentary about it. In this case I got home, she looked at me and started talking about what Geiger had done. I mentioned to her that I gotten a haircut her reply was "Yeah, I noticed." When I finally asked her how it looked she paused and then replied "Oh…uh, yeah…it, um... looks fine……oh I gotta go to the bathroom." and took off down the hall.

Being a guy, I only heard the words "it looks fine" and figured the laughter coming from down the hall was because the cat had done something funny. Even that night when I looked in the mirror I thought my hair looked good. The haircut looked OK from directly in front. A week or so later I happened to look in the mirror and turn my head to the side and then I noticed what it really looked like. I had gotten the toupee cut. This is when the hair is cut and styled perfectly on the back, front and sides. However on top the hair is cut a little too short so it sticks out horizontally. I looked like a roadkill mouse had taken up residence on top of my head. It was then I realized that the people at the various offices I visit that grinned and said "Nice haircut there" might not have been sincere. Thinking back perhaps, "Well thanks, I jut got it cut." was not necessarily the right answer. Of course the laughing should have been a giveaway but as I mentioned I'm a guy and we don't pick up on subtle things like that. Remember, the story of  'The Emperor's New Clothes'? It's not 'The Empress's New Clothes'. Only a guy would fall for that..

So I've been wearing hats a lot the last few months. I'm finally to a point where I can look at getting my hair cut again. The trouble is that I need to find another barber. Someplace with an old guy, people waiting to get in, and a real lighted motorized barber pole out front.

And they're getting hard to find.

Doug & Marsha

Pix: There is hope. The official first day of spring is this week. The first buds are appearing here and they will be where you are soon too.